"No, I am not going to punch you in the uterus. However much I'd like to."Today has been alternately lovely and fucking awful. Corin and I were going to celebrate the end of essaygate by getting up early and going to Tropical World, but we ended up sleeping until about two because it turns out that, when you've been solidly stressing and working for seemingly forever, all you really want to do is lie in your girlfriend's bed dozing as much as physically possible. So that happened instead, then she got up and made the BEST BRUNCH EVER. I mean, I have literally never been cooked anything better at the start of my day. It had fakon, Cauldron sausages, scrambled egg, FRIED HALLOUMI, and lots of other tasty things. Omg. I was very happy. I now look back on those simple times with an overwhelming ache in my ruined heart, not to mention other organs.
But I'm jumping ahead of myself. We watched lots of Buffy which, after seeing the poster in my room and dismissing my passion as 'ridiculous' and the programme as 'crap' without having ever actually watched it, then being forced to watch the first couple of episodes whilst stoned and therefore slightly more incapacitated than normal, Corin is now obsessed with (hooray!). UNfortunately, despite the joy this afforded us, this is when my problems began, i.e. my period started. Thus followed a fucking excruciating day. I mean, my first day is always The Painful One, but this one's been much worse than any in recent memory. I decided at length to have a boiling hot bath and read some Frankenstein (apparently I work every day now, what is that?!), which was quite nice, particularly given the disturbingly noisy but ultimately pleasing jacuzzi function in Corin's bath (seriously, what kind of fucking student accommodation is this). Also, I really like Frankenstein. While I was in the bath Corin went out to buy me nice things, like painkillers and rum to have with hot milk and honey and Greek yoghurt and Really Light Ribena and a Galaxy bar and also some surprise icecream, because she is lovely. But then my period pains started again, and I spent about fifteen minutes on the toilet, before flumping downstairs and writhing around in agony for a bit. Corin suggested I lie on my back with my feet against the wall, which made me feel better for a bit, until The Agony Returned to such an extent that I started crying on her. Ludicrous. I am now in the aftermath of this - the pain is still here, but not so bad, and I now have more rum and hot milk, and Corin is drawing graffitis for her friends on Facebook while we listen to Metric. (Omg can't wait to see them in May omg omg omg so excited. Actually, on a sidenote, I am going to have the best April/May EVAR - Men and Evelyn Evelyn in April, and She & Him and Metric in May. What? Oh, yes, that's just my amazing life there. ANYWAY.) The problem is, today I have had a 500mg paracetamol and two Nurofen Expresses and I have yet to be freed from the vice in my womb, and I wanted to go to a femsoc-orientated partay this evening that I very much doubt I will make now. Ugh.
